melancholy

I feel more and more useless everyday. I don't know why, but I feel lonely inhabiting in a population over 17 million. Everyone I usually spend time with all have things to do, all have started their lives. I have yet to do that. Where they are beginning their lives, there I am resting at an impasse. Everyone is moving around me, and I am standing still. I observe those who connect and live around me, and I am envious. I visited Pudong again today, and I was the only person who was trekking around alone. Everyone else either had fellow workers (同士), fellow students (同学), or significant others to be with them and enjoying the scenery. I immediately regretted leaving the home. All I could do was watch them develop deep feelings for those they care for, and I am here, without even direction to go to find my own.

Hopefully I'll be starting work soon, and that can take my mind off things.

Since it's the new month, I can make another flickr slideshow. Be on the lookout for that in a coupla days.

design in shanghai

I get very mixed views on the stake design has here in China. Some say that it's something not yet spread, and some say it's not something that will. I guess it's all based on their lack of knowledge on this subject, and they're simply stating how they feel about the subject. Nevertheless, whenever people ask me my major (专业), they restate it with confusion. "Industrial Design? What's that?" (工业设计？是什么？) And I painstakingly attempt to describe what design is about in my words. It's pretty damn hard, especially since I have to explain in Chinese. And even after I explain, they still really don't know what it is.

However, through my observations of everyday life here, I find that Shanghai has yet to be assimilated into a lifestyle where design makes life beautiful. I mean design holistically. Of course everything here still has an aspect of design, but the old is still the new, which makes things look the same here as it was 10 years ago. I'm not saying that Shanghai looks the same as 10 years before (far from it), but it feels the same. Way of life, things like that, it's still pretty static. I'm not saying it's a bad thing, I'm just saying that it could be way better. I have hope that I may have a future in design in China, and that I can make a difference. But that's just fantasy talking.

looks like i'll be seeing you sooner

just got an email this morning. HKPU has expressed that they cannot accommodate us for the fall semester. Which means that after my stint in Shanghai, I will have to return to tech for one semester. I don't think simply noting down my frustration will be enough to exemplify it, so I will simply say nothing at all.